Posted by: littlegirlyone | November 5, 2007

over the knee

i know there was a transition – andrew hardly scooped up sniveling lg and promptly spanked her. but, i’m not remembering exactly what happened between the time i stopped crying, and the moment he laid me over his lap.

i remember snippets: i protested about my dress again, as he hiked it up around my shoulders. in response, he rolled my dress (a light, stretchy black cotton) into a sort of ropey tube and stuffed the tube between my teeth. a gag. i was so happy to have something in my mouth that i let go of some of my anxiety about losing my dress (although i was still, technically, wearing it, it provided no coverage below my neck). i remember, quite distinctly, being pressed backwards again. only this time, i was exposed from nape to toe.

andrew spoke to me in hushed tones about my anxieties. it wasn’t my place to tell him what was sexy. i was sexy to him, and that was the end of it. admittedly, this was a battle for me. i accept that, on an intellectual level, this anxiety, this self-centered obsession, is really the opposite of submission. it is a form of control. and, it is not healthy control, but insidious control that makes me feel so genuinely awful that i don’t feel like i’m controlling anything.

in any event, he whispered me through this place where i’ve often been. this is the point where, in previous encounters, i’ve come up with some brilliantly transparent excuse and left the party. this is the point where i start to feel like this whole thing is silly, like i can’t understand what in the world i am doing. this is a point of my resistance.

i didn’t leave. in fact, moments later, i found myself across his lap.

i remember the awkwardness of laying myself there. i was terrified. i have this perception of myself as heavy and immovable. i often worry that i will crush things, people, men. i felt slightly comforted by the position: he was on the couch, so my upper body was supported by the furniture, and i was less likely to smoosh him into oblivion.

i was also strangely calm my first time over a man’s knee. i wasn’t afraid of him actually hurting me, physically. everything he’d done to me thus far was done with restraint and tenderness. meg sat on the floor, near my legs and her owners feet.

i remember him cooing about my panties, and i felt flushed and happy that he was pleased with them. then i felt his hand firmly drawing them down, until they were about halfway between my ass and my knees, he left them there, which i thought was fantasy-perfect. i could just picture myself, pink panties gathered around my thighs, frame bent over, ass in the air. the picture gave me a thrill of desire.

and then he started to spank me. it was soft at first. later, meg pouted that i’d been lucky enough to receive a warm up. it didn’t hurt, it was more like a small jolt. but i could tell that he was hitting me harder, and it began to sting, although not in a wholly unpleasant way. he alternated landings between my left and right cheek, and held me rather close to his frame with his free hand.

i don’t remember if i made any noise, or said anything. in my mind, i can feel my face pressed into the sofa’s velvety cushions, and my mouth forming the word “ouch.” but, i can’t tell you accurately if i said that word, or really, if i said anything at all.

somewhere toward the peak of the experience, i felt that chasm again; that yawning opening of hungry desire . . . i wanted so much more of this: this stingy pain, this warm humiliation, this face smothering intimacy, this purpose. for indeed, i felt for all the world that this spanking, this, was my sole and perfect use.

when the spanking ceased, i lay on his lap for a while. meg took some pictures, which i’ll indulge you with because you’ve all been so patient and good to me in my retelling. we talked about everyone’s “okay”-ness. and when i sat down again, i felt, for the first time in my entire life, the warm, red sting on my ass.

it made me smile dreamily.


Responses

  1. lg,Very erotic…..thankyou.-TFP

  2. hey, good girl! i was like, “i don’t think lg is posting anything yet, but i’ll check in anyway.” and then i found a very happy surprise! yay! i’m going to write something about this too now. because it was a big deal for me as well. πŸ™‚

  3. congrats on such lovely redness. thank you for giving me more to which i can aspire. will you create a gallery of all your greatest hits?

  4. Just perfect in every way.

  5. congratulations on your first otk. it’s my favorite way to start or end any day:)

  6. lg, I loved reading this post. I had the same sort of perception of myself before my first OTK spanking and also the comfort of a couch at the time. There is nothing quite like the lovely warm stingy feeling of a freshly spanked bottom. I hope you will feel it more times than you can ever count. It’s wonderfully addictive.

  7. I remember being very nervous about my first spanking… I was quite certain it would scar me for life, actually. But it’s surprising and wonderful how comforting a nice hot bottom can be πŸ™‚ Now, daddy’s spankings are a way he can keep me grounded, happy, and feeling loved.

  8. Lg,”i remember the awkwardness of laying myself there. i was terrified. i have this perception of myself as heavy and immovable. i often worry that i will crush things, people, men. i felt slightly comforted by the position: he was on the couch, so my upper body was supported by the furniture, and i was less likely to smoosh him into oblivion.”This so rang true for me. I am by no means a petite woman, and won’t ever be, so when Master sat down on a kitchen chair and told me to bend over His knee, I felt extremely uncomfortable in the way that you described. It’s never an easy thing, pushing yourself to go somewhere in which you know will heighten your anxiety – which is what me bending over his knee did to me.My thoughts are with you, and I’m glad it turned out well.Lucy

  9. really, my thanks to all of your for your heartfelt support. i’m glad you found my *tail* arousing, and i look forward to being able to have more *hands on* experiences in the future. it was really great to see so many readers come out of the woodwork on this post. i don’t know how many of you have been quietly reading all along, and how many of you have just found me, but to all of you, welcome, and thank you for commenting.kitty, this was my first spanking, really. but the next time i find myself so well used, you can bet i’ll post about it, and hopefully have a picture to share.honeyspank and daddy’slucy,i can see that the feeling would be very addictive. when i was properly dressed again, i found i could not keep my hands from rubbing my tingling hot bottom. it was a divine sensation that i, too, hope to feel again.Lucy,i think i am a little oversensitive about my weight. i’m actually rather short, but i occasionally have these very vulnerable moments where i feel like a bowling ball. i hate when people pick me up, or sit me on their lap, which of course means i’ve eroticized both of those things like mad. i’m terrified of them, but i want them oh so much. do you have that feeling, too?thanks again to all!

  10. i love being spanked. i love the pain, the electric sting of his hand on my ass. i love the submission. i love his pleasure from hurting me. i love how he loves my screams and tears. i love how when he’s done he strokes my head and says i’m his good kitten now. and i love how very very close we feel afterwards.as for that beautiful picture of your spanked ass, it reassured me that yup, i really am bisexual…

  11. oatmeal girl,*blush* thank you. *smile*i am a little bit speechless πŸ˜‰


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