Posted by: littlegirlyone | November 20, 2008

the disciplinarian

cross-posted with my fetlife profile. if we’re not friends yet, i’d love you to add me 🙂

the way you look at me makes my insides twist with longing. but i can’t see your eyes now, because i’m facing the wall. it occurs to me that i could turn my head, glance

i want to, i want to, i want to.

this thing happens when i stand close to you: it’s hard to breathe. my chest feels heavy with the thickness of desire. i want to breathe you in, i want to absorb your energy, but it’s too much. it overwhelms me, viscous like maple syrup.

i sway a little, closing my eyes, focusing on absorbing. just like a little sponge, i am absorbing all the mapley goodness i can hold, and sadly allowing some to puddle on the floor. i can’t hold it all. you know i can’t hold it all.

but, i want to, i want to, i want to.

the way you stand behind me, the way i can’t see what you’re doing, or whether you have something in your hands, the way you continue to surprise me, the anticipation of what you will probably do, the humiliation of what i’m hoping you will do, and the desire i have for you to do those things (anything you want with me). all these connected thoughts swirl inside me and make the hair on the back of my neck sway in the breeze you create just by moving the slightest bit in the space behind me.

i’m fully dressed, but i feel bare. afterall, you know what i’ve been thinking about all day. you made sure i’d think about it. you always do. getting your message: the cold tone, the evenhandedness, the complete control. i really don’t affect you. not the way i’m used to, not at all. i don’t bring out your mercy, and that both thrills and scares me. i put myself in your hands and i know you will make sure i’m safe, taken care of, but not neccessarily happy. no, not happy at all sometimes. but fulfilled. fulfilled by the fact that i’m not happy, but that my unhappiness is making you happy. fulfilled by wanting you so so so so badly. wanting to touch you. wanting to wrap my pink lips around your cock. wanting to feel that little rush, that charge of erotic power that i always feel.

i can make you feel good, and you don’t care. the fact that you don’t care makes me squirm with desire to show you. there are all these things i can do, things that you would enjoy. things that might make you want me. but you never let me do these things, and the more you deny me, the more i want to.

i want to, i want to, i want to.

“little girl, why are you here?”

your voice makes me jump, even though it was a whisper. i’m hot with humiliation, i’m staring at the floor. i’m pink with need, i’m wet like a dew-kissed petal. i can’t say it. i’ve formed six words into a string but i can’t spit it out. i open my mouth, slack jawed.

i. close. my. eyes.

“i need you to punish me.”


Responses

  1. Thats really well written!

  2. amazing!! i love it i love it i love it. 🙂

  3. That was OUTSTANDING!! So intense… thank you for sharing it!!!!

  4. Nicely said 😉

  5. wow! what poetry. beautiful. and so so hot.


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